Hannah Montana: Reloaded
by PoetOfWhispers
Summary: Rewrite of "Hannah Montana: The Movie." Hannah is sick of leading a double life, so her father takes her back to her roots in her hometown of Crowley Corners, Tennessee. Complications ensue when vampires and zombies make an appearance.
1. Prologue: Concert

"Are you ready to rock tonight!" Hannah Montana shouted joyously as she rose up through the stage. "YEAH!" the crowd answered in unison as the opening riffs of "Best of Both Worlds" filled the air.

"HANNAH! HANNAH! HANNAH!" the crowd chanted. Hannah flashed her fans a smile and began to sing. The pop star life was more than she could ask for, but getting to be a normal girl at the same time was just too much. She felt like the luckiest girl in the world when she stood on stage and belted out those songs to the crowd. She looked out into the audience; thousands of girls were having the time of their lives.

The song ended. "You guys want some more?" she screamed.

"YEAH!" the crowd yelled again in agreement.

Oswald Granger sat restlessly in his seat, watching the teen icon dance and sing with a cynical eye. "No duh," he said in an uncharacteristically American tone. "It's only the second song of the whole show."

Oswald was the willing servant of Lucinda. Most people didn't dare call her by her real name though; by most of her cohorts, she was referred to as "The Succubus." Oswald had never heard of an immortal of greater age or strength, and he did his best to please Lucinda as her minion. He had an ulterior motive, however. He wanted The Succubus's immortality, to drink her blood and take the curse of the vampire into his own body.

For a while now, Oswald had been pursuing the teen pop icon Hannah Montana by order of The Succubus. The girl was a worldwide sensation, and she wanted to know why. Her cohorts had speculated that Hannah was in fact an extremely powerful vampire with a mind control power, thus owing to her gargantuan following. The Succubus was shocked to think that there could be a vampire out there with power equal to hers – perhaps even greater. As a result, she had sent Oswald on a mission to find out more about this girl and if she really was one of the children of darkness.

The music infuriated him. Bubblegum pop wasn't Oswald's taste; he would have preferred a Mozart piano sonata any day. But he had to sit through it. He had to meet this alleged vampire and find out what she really was.

"Okay guys, this is my last song for the night. You guys have been awesome! Thanks so much for coming out to see me!" Hannah said about an hour later.

"Thank God," Oswald grumbled aloud, getting out of his seat and beginning to make his way towards the backstage area. He got through the pit before a security guard caught him.

"Hey you!" the guard said. He was fat and eating a Boston Cream donut. "Nobody's allowed back there."

Oswald thought on his feet. The fangirls were too engrossed in Miss Montana's performance to notice anything unusual.

"Oh really?" he said in his cold British accent. The security guard grabbed him, and he punctured his flesh with a syringe. A sedative of The Succubus's invention pumped swiftly through his veins, and he was out cold.

"Good night!" he cackled, proceeding to Hannah's dressing room.

He stood outside her doorway. Her door was open just a crack, but he could see inside. "Wait, what's she doing?" he murmured to himself.

Hannah pulled off her blond wig, revealing a full head of wavy brown hair.

"It cannot be!" Oswald said. "She looks like a totally different person!"

"Is someone there?" Hannah said, frantically pulling her wig back on.

"Um, yes!" Oswald said, cursing silently to himself. "May I have your autograph and a picture with you, Miss Montana? My daughters absolutely adore you!" He produced a picture of his daughters and showed it to the pop star.

"Um, sure," Hannah said awkwardly, pulling out a pen.

"Hold on right there, missy!" Oswald heard a female voice say.

"Vita, what's wrong? He just wants my autograph and a picture."

"Sorry sweetie, but that's not an option. This guy's from a tabloid, and if you give anything out to him, he'll wreck your career!" Vita said angrily.

"For the last time, Vita, I don't work for a tabloid, I work for a secret society headed by one of the most ancient vampires in the world!" Oswald said, annoyed.

"Uh-huh. And my mother is Lady Gaga. Get the hell out of here!" she said, calling security.

"Damn! Thwarted again!" Oswald whined while being carried off.

"Honey," Vita said to Hannah, "this is why you need a publicist. It takes a lot to be a normal girl and a pop star at the same time."

Hannah grumbled. "Sometimes I wish I could just live one life."


	2. Chapter One: Ruined

Chapter One

Ruined

"Dammit!" Miley yelled as a volleyball hit her square in the forehead.

"Watch your language!" yelled the gym teacher from across the gym. Miley growled and cursed under her breath.

"Ugh, gym class sucks, doesn't it?" Lilly said. "I wish that it was optional."

"Well that's not going to happen any time soon," Miley said ruefully, massaging her head. "Hold on, I have a text." She waited until she was sure the gym teacher wasn't looking and pulled out her phone.

"Who is it?" Lilly asked.

"Vita. Hannah shopping emergency! I have to go!"

"But Miley, what about my birthday party?"

"I'll be there, Lilly, I promise!" she said, running to the locker room to change. "I just really have to go now."

Lilly rolled her eyes and continued with the game.

Miley sat in her Hannah garb in the back of her limo. She checked the time on her phone. She had to get to Lilly's party.

"Vita is there anyway we can get to the store any _faster_?" she grumbled, shifting uneasily in her seat.

"Sorry honey, there are speed limits we need to abide by. And this is absolutely necessary. You're filling in for Beyoncé in New York, for heaven's sake! Can't you be patient?"

"Um, no! I have to go to Lilly's party!"

"Too bad, honey. You have to have something nice to wear!"

"Well, I do love to shop…"

Vita smiled. "Wow, talk about having a short attention span."

The limo parked beside Miley's favorite designer clothing outlet and she briskly jumped out of the limo, entering the store and immediately becoming enthralled by the wide variety of shoes.

"Ooh, these look nice!" Miley said in a schoolgirl voice. Suddenly, another pair caught her eye. "Holy cow. Come to mama!"

She walked over to the pair of high heels, standing red and sequined on a pedestal. Just looking at them almost made her mouth water. She reached out for once, but was interrupted by a familiar voice – familiar, but changed somehow.

"Excuse me," the voice said. "I believe _I_ saw those first."

Miley looked up. Tyra Banks stood before her, eyeing up the shoes she so desperately wanted. But Tyra looked different. Her skin seemed tight and sallow, and her eyes were a piercing shade of crimson.

"Sorry," Miley said, unafraid. "These are mine."

A grimace of anger stretched across Tyra's face. Her sickly-looking skin made it all the more horrific. "Do you know who I _am_?"

"I know you know who I am," Miley said flippantly, grabbing the shoes and running.

"Get back here!" Tyra screeched. Miley looked back and saw that her lips had retracted, revealing a set of sharp, white canine teeth. Impossibly, Tyra was literally _flying _at her from across the room.

"Crap," Miley said. "Get me out of here, Vita!"

"Give me my shoes, you little brat!" Tyra shrieked like banshee, knocking Miley to the floor with her body. She wrenched the high heels from her grasp and cackled cruelly.

"Hannah!" Vita screamed in disbelief. "She's a vampire! You have to get out of here!"

Miley pulled herself at the floor as Tyra stared at the shoes with glee. "No," she said, pulling a clump of her disheveled hair out of her face. "I want my shoes!"

Tyra hissed inhumanly. "We can do this the hard way, or the easy way!"

"I'll take the hard way, you hag!"

"Good!" Tyra said, baring her fangs. "Because I'm _very _hungry!"

At lightening speed, Tyra shot out her arms and grabbed Miley. She struggled as Tyra pulled her squirming body closer. Miley felt her heart flutter unevenly as Tyra snarled and drove her fangs into her neck. Her face contorted in pain as Tyra sucked the crimson life from her body. She felt a single red drop trickle down her neck and recoiled in horror as Tyra's tongue shot out and licked it off the soft surface of her skin.

Miley tried to gather her scrambled thoughts and think of a way out. Her veins ached with each suck, and she could feel her energy drain from her body as it rouged her blonde wig and dress. But she had to fight the pain. There must be some way out of it.

She turned her head every so slightly and opened her mouth, breathing heavily into Tyra's face. The odor of the garlic salt she had thrown on the mediocre cafeteria pizza at lunch still clung to her breath.

"Ah! You little bitch!" Tyra screamed, pushing Miley away.

"Die you undead hag!" Miley screamed as she picked up one of the high heels and smacked it across Tyra's sickly face. Good thing the shoes were already red, she thought, avoiding the problem of bloodstains.

Tyra's scream continued as the sticky red blood flowed from the cuts Miley had inflicted on her face. She stared in horror as the cuts healed almost instantaneously.

Miley ran to the door, but it was locked. She turned the door handle forcefully, but it was locked. Vita stood nearby, too shocked to think of anything to do.

Tyra picked up a single high heel and hurled across the room at Miley. It shot through the air like a boomerang and its sharp heel lodged itself in the glass of the door. Miley gasped as she saw that it had pinned her to the door by her sleeve.

"Now I've got you!" Tyra snarled, releasing a witch-like cackle. She stalked slowly towards Miley, her crimson eyes catlike and her fingers curled like claws. She came face to face with Miley and hissed softly, craning her neck to lick the dribble of blood off of Miley's skin again. Her body tingled with a strange mix of disgust and dark desire as Tyra's tongue slithered over her trembling flesh. It too was catlike, course and sticky, almost seeming to have a mind of its own as it tasted her fear.

Miley's ears nearly exploded when she heard Tyra shriek again.

"Miley, pull yourself free and get the hell out!" Vita yelled. She had opened the blinds of the store windows to let in the sunlight. Miley had thought they were closed to keep the paparazzi at bay, but she realized now their true purpose as Tyra's body burned.

"Ah! You've murdered me! I'll ruin you! I'll ruin your career forever!"

Miley pulled herself away from the vampire celebrity's teeth and hastily grabbed the shoes. "I guess I'll have to pay for them later," she said, running out the door.

Unfortunately, the paparazzi had gathered the minute the blinds were lifted and continued to take pictures of Hannah and Tyra's catfight. _This will be something for the tabloids_, Miley thought. Tyra scrambled to the back room, her skin blistering in the sun's golden rays.

Miley scrambled into the car with Vita, punching one photographer in the face before making a hasty getaway.

"What the _hell _is her problem?" she asked in disbelief.

"I didn't know the rumors were true," Vita sighed.

"What rumors?"

"Rumors that celebrities are seeking out vampires so that they can be turned immortal."

"Why would you want to be a bloodsucking hag?"

"Vampirism is the ultimate fountain of youth. Even Britney Spears is going to turn into a wrinkled old lady one day, but if you're a vampire, you can be young and beautiful forever."

Miley sighed. "I thought vampires weren't real."

"So did I. But you'd be surprised at the lengths some celebrities will go for beauty, even seeking out mythical creatures. Vampirism is supposedly turning into quite a fad."

"Oh crap," Miley said. "I'm still bleeding."

Vita pulled a handkerchief out of her purse and wrapped it around the wound on Miley's neck. "It's not too deep. She didn't have much time to feed before I let the sun in. It could have been a lot worse."

Miley shuddered. "Does this mean _I'm_ going to turn into a vampire?"

"I don't think so," Vita said. Miley breathed a sigh of relief. "From what I hear, you have to drink the blood of another vampire to become one. You didn't drink any of Tyra's blood, so you're fine. She could have sucked you dry and killed you."

Another chill shot through Miley's body. "Crap! Lilly's party!"

"I can get us there," Vita said, leaning to instruct the limo driver. "Damn. We have company," she said, annoyed.

Miley turned around to see Oswald in his car, following the limo intently.

"Vita! What are we going to do?" Miley cried. "I can't change out of Hannah, or he'll know my secret identity!"

"Well honey, I guess you'll just have to go the party as Hannah. You can't change in the back; he's watched us like a hawk."

Miley groaned. "Ugh. I guess there's no other choice."

"Sorry honey."

Lilly stood at the top of the skating ramp, fidgeting nervously. _Where's Miley?_ she wondered over and over, watching from her lofty perch. And yet, she found it strangely difficult to concentrate on just one thing. A skater boy stood beside her, his olive-colored skin and deep brown hair shining in the Malibu sun. She found his presence incredibly distracting.

"Hi," she said awkwardly, holding her skateboard. "I'm Lilly Truscott. And you?"

The boy smiled. "Hi, I'm lucky!"

"That can't be your real name!"

"It might as well be after seeing you smile!"

Lilly giggled. "Aw, that's so – AH!" She tripped and began to slide down the ramp, only to have the boy catch her by her hand.

"Aw, thank you," she smiled.

"No problem. Wait, is that Hannah Montana?"

The glee on Lilly's face turned to horror as the boy stared at the now screaming crowd, releasing his ardent grip and letting her tumble down the curved ramp.

"HANNAH MONTANA!" she heard the audience scream.

"No…effing…way," she groaned, pulling herself up. Thank God she had kneepads on.

She walked to the ravenous crowd that had now formed. Miley walked through the middle – in her wig and Hannah garb – surrounded by bodyguards. Lilly could hardly believe her eyes as her best friend waved to the audience.

"I would just like to say happy sweet sixteen to Lilly Truscott!" Miley said into a microphone. "Everyone! Look at Lilly over there!"

But nobody did look. Everyone was too focused on Hannah's parade through the crowd.

"Lilly I am so sorry! I can explain, really!" Miley said to her dismayed friend, a regretful look crossing her face. "I will make it up to you."

Lilly scoffed, and shouted at her, "Do you really think that you can _ever _even begin to make this up to me? This was supposed to be _my _day, not Hannah's! This has shown me what you really are, _Hannah_." She spat out her friend's stage name with sarcasm and contempt. "You are nothing but an attention whore!"

"Lilly!" Miley screamed, but her call was lost in the roar of the crowd as they carried her to the stage to play with the band.

Lilly spat on the pavement and threw her skateboard aside. She couldn't believe that her special day had been eclipsed by her so-called best friend, that what seemed to be the perfect party had turned to disaster. The screams the crowd and the music were drowned out by her increasingly rueful thoughts towards her former friend.

The media had already arrived, naturally. As she walked out of her own party, one man caught her by the arm and began to speak to her.

"Who the hell are you, creep?" Lilly growled, infuriated.

"My name is Oswald," the slightly rotund, middle-aged man said in a cold British accent. "And I was wondering if you knew anything on Hannah."

Lilly considered this a moment in the head. She was one of the few people who knew Hannah's secret identity. In fact, she was so close with her friend that she could have probably made millions with all of the dirt she had on her personal life. Was it right to give all of these secrets away, to spoil all of what had ever blossomed from their once glowing friendship?

Of course. She was an attention whore after all.

"Hannah is no one special," she said in a calmer tone. "I'll have you know that she's from a tiny redneck town in Tennessee called Crowley Corners."

"Just how redneck is this town?" Oswald questioned.

"I don't know if there's incest and shacks for houses and all of that stuff," she admitted. "But it isn't Beverly Hills, if you get my drift."

"Of course," Oswald said, scribbling on a little notepad. "And how would you spell that?"

Lilly began to walk away. _This is wrong_, she thought. So what if Miley had trashed her party. She didn't deserve to have her entire life ruined by a former friend.

All of that sympathy vanished when Lilly remembered the disappearing face of the angelic boy as she plummeted down the ramp.

She turned around and faced Oswald. "It's spelled like it sounds."


End file.
